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Only 30 seconds of perusing the Graun and my blood pressure is through the fuckin' roof 
Back to the Moomins.
@fkamiah17 I read that as Mormons...
@suearcher The day that happens, please immediately drive down from Yorkshire and batter me to death with a shovel.
@fkamiah17 will do! Although it'll be a detour to come from Yorkshire, I might just come straight from Manchester. 
We have a range of shovels, do you have a preference?
@suearcher Surprise me 
@fkamiah17 I think shovelling you to death will be a surprise anyway! 
@fkamiah17@syzito.xyz@suearcher 
A mercy killing, if things continue as they are *sigh*